From the Crystal and Violence series.
Jealousy and crystal - this is the worst combination of human emotions and mind-altering chemicals possible. Friday night was starting out good, as it had for the past five years, as we got ready to view some porn flicks. Since my partner is bisexual, he usually chooses the flicks we watch. I go along with his choices because on the way up I get off by watching him get hard and cum. After four to five more quarters spread over Saturday and early Sunday, I would have to think about work on Monday.
This was standard procedure, except one particular Sunday afternoon. Some girls came over and they liked to do crystal. But I declined while the rest of them did up some more. My partner was dressed in spandex, sitting on the couch with one of the girls, when he began to get a hard on. I felt rages begin to build and, instead of leaving the room, I sat and watched the two of them watch it grow. I did not restrain myself much longer; my threshold had been reached. The first thing I went for was his dick. I didn't make it, but I beat and threw him around as much as I could while the screaming girls fled the apartment. The downstairs neighbor called the police. As they arrived, we agreed to tell them I didn't hit him.
There were so many incidences, different situations, but all resulting the same way. In two years we had 26 police visits, 5 ODs - I was one of them (there was sometimes heroin also). My partner nearly died from AIDS complications and after eight months of rehab, we are still close friends.
I am so sorry, sweetheart.
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